i need something.

something to motivate me.

something to entertain me.

something to stimulate me.

my life in it's current state does none of those. hence the need for something. i don't know what. and that could be the problem.

work is way too boring and the customers treat me like scum, 'tis the joy of working in the hospitality industry. i just spend my days smiling politely and nodding my head like a moron while they bitch and moan.

my social life is not dead and buried just yet, it's quite possibly on it's last legs but just when i think it's all over it takes another breath.

on saturday night i went to see some bands play. it was a good night. i went with my sorta friend KC. she told me all about losing (what she called) her 'bi-virginity' the night before. and in graphic detail. way too much information, but that's just the way she is, she's a little socially retarded. and she's the first to admit it. she doesn't really get the whole environment appropriate topic of conversation thing. i mean her telling me about the inner workings of girl on girl action may have been appropriate in a less public forum as opposed to the line outside the place where we were waiting to get in. i noticed several people surrounding us listening intently. and i even told her i didn't need the details and she still persisted. but i guess that's her charm. she can be really child-like sometimes. a child who has threesomes and snorts coke. maybe that's the something i'm missing. maybe i should become a bisexual drug user. that will definitely provide me with entertainment and stimulation.

hmmm.... food for thought.

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