i've spent the past three days applying for any job that i think i could possibly stand. i am going out of my mind not doing anything. i'll clarify that, i'm going out of my mind not having any money to do anything with. i am not a person who wants to work. if i didn't have such expensive taste in shoes, if i didn't need to go out every weekend and get tanked, if i wasn't addicted to ebay... you get the idea, i wouldn't have a problem with my mounds of free time. i just have a problem with no money.

it amuses me that actors get paid millions of dollars to make movies and they complain about paparazzi and gruelling schedules. if i got to the point where i could make a movie for more money than the average person could make in a life time i would do it, take the money and become a hermit. alas, i'm not an actor... so i will never be in that position, although even if i was an actor i'd most likely be waiting on tables anyway. hmm... the next time someone asks me what i do i'm gonna say that i'm an actress. then when i say i'm currently unemployed it won't be awkward... it will be expected. better than explaining the whole cancer saga.

i think i'm going to see rockstarboy and his band play tonight. should be interesting. he called me to see if i was coming. i think he's worried that no one will be there. he acted like we hadn't had an argument, like he hadn't said any of the horrible things he did. i tried to bring it up but he just glossed over it so i let it go. it's not like we see eachother all the time. i'll survive.

it's way too hot today, i'm thinking about moving to tasmania.

funniest thing i've read today at catjamboree.diaryland.com talking about a time machine. "I borrowed Bon Jovi's. He's kind of a dick about it, but if you ask him really nicely and promise to proofread his memoirs, you might be able to borrow it too."

if you don't find that and the entire entry funny then go fuck yourself. it's a classic. i wish i could come up with something like that. instead i'm relegated to the category of boring hack. well i guess that's why we have winners and losers. i fall into the latter...obviously.

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