i feel the urge to write, alas i haven't anything to write about. it's quite weird really. perhaps my subconscious if telling me that there is something...

i've been staring blankly at the screen for the past ten minutes, i'm not sure if there is anything.

hmmm...

ok here's something. j and a whole group of girls are going to the desperate and dateless ball in a couple of weeks. they want me to go but i'm not sure if it's really my thing. i'm not really into drunks hitting on me, even at the pub i feel obligated to talk to them because they have the balls to approach me, i can't just walk away, so is going to a singles ball really a good idea? and it could be worse. what if i go to a singles ball and no one hits on me? that would be even worse. and apparently just by being there i'm telling all the men in the building that i want them. well that's what z said. i told him that i might go, although i have no intention of hooking up with anyone. he proceeded to tell me how men are and the fact that i was there meant that i was on the prowl. i didn't need the explanation. i'm not that type. i've never gone anywhere or done anything in order to find a man, i'm quite content by myself.

s told me his theory on me and men. it went something like...

"you're quite intimidating, the only guys that would have the balls to approach you are either arrogant, drunk, dumb or a combination of the three. and you don't like guys like that. you wouldn't approach the men that you would be interested in and they wouldn't approach you so basically you're either gonna end up with some cocky dumb fuck or you'll die alone."

he's so reassuring. i love s. he's right though apart from ending up with some guy, i'm never gonna settle for second best. but he's sort of in the same boat, he doesn't like girls that come onto him and yet in order to talk to a girl he has to be absolutely slaughtered thus what he has to say isn't all that coherent.

got a bit off topic there. the question is should i go to the desperate and dateless ball? i'm leaning towards a no. anything worth doing doesn't require this much thought.

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